Erm's I.T. Girl – Zelna Ellis

Don't fear when Zel is near…

Computer Industry vs Vehicle Auto Industry

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on.

‘If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.’

GM’s Response:
1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash……..
Twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive – but would run on only five percent of the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single ‘This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation’ warning light.
I love the next one!!!

7. The airbag system would ask ‘Are you sure?’ before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

10. You’d have to press the ‘Start’ button to turn the engine off.

Source unknown

15 April 2010 Posted by | Jokes | , , | Leave a comment

Taking a look at now and then

This must be one of the most exciting "ages" that we live in. I’m taking a look at technology. Yes I am a geek. So What?

The Super-Info Highway was drifting somewhere in outer space when I grew up.

In short:

I worked for the first time on a computer in 1987. With floppy, stiffy disks and tapes. With a choice of black and green or orange visual display unit (monitor). It had no hard disk.
Note in South Africa we call a 3½-inch floppy disk a stiffy disk.

My first computer was an Olivetti M290 with 2 X 10MB hard drive, 64K RAM, an 8-bit soundcard, 256 shades of gray on a 14 inch gray monitor… It was a beast we built it up out of 2 computers running on DOS and later upgraded to Windows 3.1. He-He…

SVGA Monitors and Wysiwig (What-you-see-is-what-you-get) blew my hair backwards. Was the next best thing besides sliced bread. An entire spreadsheet programme could fit on a HD stiffy disk (1.44MB). We also used a program FD-Format to have more storage space. Larry Suite Larry, Space Quest and Police Quest were my favourite games. Listened to MIDI files on the computer. The first programme I wrote was pages long. Used assembly language too with hex code flags and so on. Developed a database programme with COBOL, also a lot of pages. Will only need a few lines of coding to write the same programs with the tools available nowadays. The web and e-mail messages were plain text with dial-up networking 56K. Coax was used for networks. And then later on CAT5… Also CD-ROM’s made very nice coffee cup holders. My first cell phone was a Philips. The thing weighed a brick and I went WOW over a SMS.

Then we got the boom: Hyper threading, USB, DVD+R, DVD-R, DVD-RAM, Duel Processors, Blue-Ray, VOIP, Web-cams, Wi-Fi, Bluetooth, Fire wire, USB Flash Drives, And amazingly enough the stiffy survived. The Super-Info Highway arrived… Multimedia, Social Networking, Webucation, Webconferences, online bookings, shopping, just to name a few. Cellphones are now smart phones: MMS, e-mail, video, MP4, instant chat, Bluetooth, camera, modem (EDGE, HSPDA…), office programs, music, radio, games, GPS, clocks, PIM’s, mobile TV, Web, Video calling, fax, extra storage too, saw one with a small built-in torch too… We have cars nowadays that can park itself. Not even to mention the X-Box, Nintendo, Play station, PVR’s and so on.

I don’t think in the history of mankind on this planet we have ever seen such changes as we saw in the last decade. Where a cellphone is better than the first shuttle that went into outer space. One can write books about it and there are so much more tech changes that have not been even mentioned in this post. It just goes on and on and on…

StarTrek is here. But remember I.T. is not whether a machine can think, it is whether mankind can think.

8 July 2009 Posted by | Technologies | , , , | 1 Comment